Hi, I hope you are all doing as best as you can. I’m Steve, initially from South London but now living in Guisborough with Angie, my better half, who is a Boro lass and Bea, our dog. We have two daughters Abbie and Erin who are both currently at University.

Around February/ March time in 2010, Angie advised me to make a GP appointment as she was concerned about a raised black mark on the back of my left calf. At the initial appointment, my GP reassured me that it was nothing to be concerned about and prescribed cream for psoriasis to apply for 3 months. Once completed, I made a second appointment as the mark had grown. Once again, the same GP said it was nothing to worry about and prescribed more cream. Nothing changed, so I went back for a third time and asked for another opinion. My GP asked, ‘would you like me to refer you to the hospital for your peace of mind?’.

 I was referred to the dermatology/plastic surgery department at James Cook University Hospital Middlesbrough and at my initial appointment the Doctor made a visual assessment, and a biopsy was arranged. At the results consultation, I always remember waiting in the cubicle feeling very worried, vulnerable and scared as the nurse told me that the surgeon wanted to see me in person. ALARM BELLS WERE RINGING. The surgeon came in through the Middlesbrough landmarks cubicle curtains and told me those life changing words  ‘You’ve got cancer!’. It’s a psychological and emotional hammer blow that knocks you sideways. He informed me that I had Malignant Melanoma and I needed immediate surgery! Therefore, in late September 2010 I went into James Cook University for a Wide Leg Excision on my lower left calf to remove the Melanoma tumour and surrounding tissue. I recovered from the surgery well and all tests demonstrated no further spread. All good! I had regular follow up appointment with the McMillan nurses at James Cook and in June 2016 I was discharged.  I had decided to get myself physically fitter as during my initial recovery period, I read about the benefits of how regular exercise can boost the immune system. So, I got into running! I lost weight and felt good. However, I did struggle with my mental health, linked to worrying about cancer and death and to cope with these thoughts I increased my running, completing the London Marathon twice and the Lake Windermere marathon but I also used drinking to excess as a coping strategy. However, I muddled through and carried on working and being a dad and husband, but the cancer worries dominated my thoughts.  

Then in In May 2017, I found a pea size lump in my left groin crease and I immediately ‘knew’ It was cancer. I was aware that Melanoma spreads from within and that lymph nodes soak up infections and ‘dodgy’ cells. I didn’t have a cold and felt fit and well.  I contacted my McMillan nurse, who instructed me to come in the next day. I had a fine needle extraction and the next day it was confirmed I had Metastatic Malignant melanoma and a plan of action was made.  I underwent major surgery where 15 lymph nodes were removed from my groin and pelvis. The surgery resulted in necrotic tissue leading to a major infection and prevented the wound from healing resulting in more surgery for a skin graft. I also developed bilateral pulmonary embolisms in each lung which required further surgery. This left me bed bound for several weeks and resulted in my mental health to seriously decline. I’d never felt so bad mentally and went to a dark place which was made worse as I couldn’t implement any of my usual coping strategies. On leaving hospital, my physical wellbeing improved but mentally I was really struggling so I sought help from my MacMillan nurse who referred me to the Trinity Holistic Centre based at James Cook University Hospital.

 This is a wonderful, homely environment that provides a range of specialist holistic therapies for people experiencing and living with cancer and their immediate carers. Angie and I had massages and Reiki which helped to calm our anxieties but what really helped and provided me with short- and long-term strategies was engaging in Psychological support sessions. These sessions introduced me to Acceptance Commitment Therapy and Mindfulness, and I continue to apply these strategies daily to ‘gym’ my mind and today I have never felt so mentally strong. I’m currently living with Stage 3 C Cancer with a statistically 67% chance of further spread and currently not receiving any direct treatment but I’m on ‘watch and wait’ with a CT scan every 6 months. However, thanks to my supportive and loving family and a focus on developing my psychological resilience with an emphasis on ‘being in the moment’, I am enjoying and living the best life and I intend to do so for as long as possible.

On reflection, following my cancer diagnosis, input from the excellent team at James Cook University Hospital had to focus on the physical and clinical interventions which saved my life. Please look after your skin as it’s your biggest organ and too much sun exposure from Sun beds can lead to Melanoma. Please check your skin for moles and unusual marks regularly as early detection is really the key in preventing a more serious and dangerous spread. However, what has enabled me to lead a good life and not put to waste the specialist input of the MDT, has been a commitment to developing my psychological resilience to help ride the emotional rollercoaster of living with cancer. I wanted to be more than just a cancer survivor, I wanted to become a cancer thriver. The support required for people to become a cancer thriver is severely lacking and the NHS and all cancer charities etc must make a real commitment in placing mental health support on parity with the clinical input. The Trinity Centre provides the support required in helping people to become cancer thriver’s BUT it is charity and as such receives no funding from the Government and relies on donations. The support they offer needs to be standard care offered to all as part of the cancer care pathway.